The disjointed, punctuation-free comment started out, oddly enough, as a pointed criticism of the latest work, saying the campaign “has really gotten stale.” At that point, the commenter switched gears and did a complete 180, saying he was “just kidding” and that he would “fellate anyone who worked on this.”
The offer could hypothetically extend to literally anyone who touched the campaign, including but by no means limited to strategists, media buyers, senior creatives, interns, account executives, and even clients.
No word yet on who, if anyone, has taken the commenter up on it, or if he (or she) is offering anything for women as well, but we’ll keep you posted. W+K was unavailable for comment, most likely because they are all busy getting their dicks sucked.
In a stunningly violent moment of epiphany, commenter Flibberty Jib’s brain exploded in the AgencySpy comments section today when he noticed that a branded communication contained something that was factually incorrect.
The commercial (or should we say “lie”) in question was this spot for Interstate Batteries by Dallas agency Firehouse. In it, we see a long-abandoned 1949 Studebacker Champion Starlight Coupe covered in weeds and vines. Although the car is overrun with vegetation its battery is still going strong, as evidenced by the song blasting from the radio. The commenter realized that no battery could possibly last that long, even one with a tagline like “Outrageously Dependable,” and “therefore, the commercial is a lie.”
He also called it “BS.”
His brains were scattered throughout the comments section, leaving contributor Erik Oster to clean up the mess and AgencySpy to deal with a potential PR nightmare.
No word yet on who will be held responsible or what impact this could have on the industry, but it raises the concern that there might be other commercials that are lies out there, which could potentially cause more brains to explode in the future.
Flibberty Jib is survived by his wife, Flimminie Jib, and his two loving children, Timmity Jib and Jimmity Jib.
We’re a little late on this one, but an AgencySpy commenter really let another commenter have it yesterday.
The bloodbath went down in a thread about a GIF award show, where commenter “CD Villneuve” kicked things off by really letting all kinds of people and companies have it including McGarryBowen London, techno-hipsters, post-Bogusky CP+B, and people who attempt to “harness grassroots internet culture.” But it wasn’t until commenter “Naysayer” jumped in to say that he actually liked the idea that things really got interesting.
How’s your week going? Okay? So-so? Kinda meh, but y’know, tomorrow’s Friday so whatever, things could be worse? You must not be in the ad school business, then, as commenter “The Old Man in the Mountain” has single-handedly taken down the portfolio school business model, dashing the hopes and dreams of hundreds of would-be creatives and burning millions of dollars in future ad school revenue in the process with a mere 34 words in the AgencySpy comments section.
“This is really not good for us,” said Ron Seichrist, the now-ruined co-founder of Miami Ad School. “Luckily Pippa has her real estate license and I’m a registered notary public. So, y’know, we should be cool.”
“The Old Man In The Mountain? Fuck that guy,” said Norm Grey, Founder & ECD of Creative Circus. “Seriously,” he added. “Right in his fuckwad ass.”
No word yet from The Old Man In The Mountain or the Miami Ad School creatives in question, but we can only assume that this is the beginning of a long-lasting creative mentorship that will be professionally fulfilling for all parties involved for the foreseeable future.
Update: Turns out all you need is a print ad for toothpaste and a banner ad for spaghetti sauce.